Am I a Good Mom?

You know that question that pops into our heads every day — with every cry, every feeding, every meltdown (whether it’s baby or us, who can tell anymore). Am I a good mom? Am I doing everything right? Should I be doing more tummy time? Have I been holding him too much?

Guilt seems to be our invisible companion, doesn’t it? Like as soon as you become a mom, you’re supposed to know everything. But here’s the thing: surprise! You have a baby in your arms, no idea what’s going on, and you’re learning right alongside him. And that’s OK, it’s actually healthy to admit it.

Learning on the Job

No one really prepares us for motherhood. We’re told it’s going to be beautiful, magical, incredible… and it is. There are those moments when you’re so proud of that little creature smiling at you or saying their first "ma-ma". But then there are moments when you feel completely drained, overwhelmed, and you dream of lying down for a 48-hour nap. Because, spoiler alert, being a mom also means being EXTREMELY tired, sometimes to the point where you fall asleep while playing peekaboo with your mini-me (I’ll admit, it’s happened to me).

The Break… and the Guilt

And then there’s that little voice in your head telling you: "You deserve a break! Leave him with Dad, or Grandma, and go take a walk alone." But here’s the catch: it’s easier said than done. The second you step away, even for a minute, guilt rushes in. "Shouldn’t I be with him? Am I missing something important? Is he going to think I’ve abandoned him?" We put so much pressure on ourselves, like taking a minute away from our baby is somehow going to undo all the love and effort we’ve put into being a good mom. It’s exhausting to always feel this way!

The Comparison Trap

And then, there are those other moms who always seem to have a smiling baby, homemade meals, and a nap schedule so perfectly timed you’d think they were running a military operation. You see them on Instagram, and suddenly you’re thinking: "How do they do it? Why does my baby cry after two minutes when I put him down? Why am I still in my pajamas at noon? Why does my house always look like a disaster zone?" And boom — here comes the downward spiral. We compare, we feel bad about ourselves, and forget that, in reality, every mom is doing the best she can with what she has.

So, Am I a Good Mom?

Yes, you are. And no, you don’t need the approval of every mom around you to know that. Being a good mom is doing your best, loving your child with all your heart, even when you don’t have an answer for their cries or when you crash on the couch at the end of the day with a bowl of cereal for dinner. It’s accepting that perfection doesn’t exist, that every day is different, and that it’s OK to ask for help, take breaks, and not always be on top of your game. The truth is, you’re doing your best. And that is more than enough!

So, mama, the next time you ask yourself if you’re a good mom, just remember: you already are, simply because you try every single day.

P.S. And if you need to retreat to your bed with a box of brownies and an episode of Bridgerton (or whatever you like), I say: GO FOR IT! You’ve earned it.